I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
