Will you blow on my dice?
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
