No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize