Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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