Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
my liver is dry heaving
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