I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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