she woke up with a sticky ear
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Is it penis luge time yet?
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
