my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
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we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
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i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
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