I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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