He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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