Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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