my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Say something about gay babies.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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