I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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