THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
