Your dad touched me again.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
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