It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize