absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
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