No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
accomplished twins. life is a go
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Randomize
