Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Randomize
