i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
