I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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