"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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