at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
the day after is always just damage control
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
