I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
