it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Randomize
