i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!