The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
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Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
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I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs