And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
is it fun? or sober?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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