Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
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