dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
