She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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