He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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