The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
It was a blind-side dick pic.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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