here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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