Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
he high fived his dick after we had sex
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize