my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
