can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize
