Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
