And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
