How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
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