He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
