ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
