Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
