We won't sleep together?
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
