Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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