I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
