Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
