I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
