I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises