You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize