so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
