i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize